The "3 A'S"
AWARENESS, ACCEPTANCE AND ACTION/SURRENDER
The “3 A’s” have been a great tool for me in my step studies, especially in the first three steps which are the foundation of our 12 Step program.
I have learned a great deal about the First Step: “We admitted we were powerless over alcohol.”
We admitted we were equally powerless over other people, their actions, places and things and that our lives had become unmanageable.” That was my first spiritual awakening. I was entirely powerless over my daughter’s addiction. I was powerless over all her actions and all her thinking. Wow! Awareness! How powerful is that?
Being aware and accepting my daughter for who she is was a bit more difficult. Here the Second Step came into the picture. I needed absolute faith in my Higher Power. “Came to believe that a Power greater than myself could restore me back to sanity.” When I could finally truly accept my daughter and separate the person from her disease, that’s when I started to understand and accept her in my heart for all the good things she is.
This meant accepting life on life’s terms; accepting lessons on my journey through life, to learn from them, and to be grateful; accepting our parents for who and what they are. Our parents will be our parents for life; accepting my children for who and what they are. They are on loan from God to us until they reach adulthood. Then it is our duty to let them go and hand them over to God as we understand Him. I learned to live my life and let them live theirs. Let them make mistakes and learn from them. Stay out of their business, and MIND MY OWN BUSINESS.
The action part came in the Third Step. I needed to trust my Higher Power before I could take any action. “Made a decision to turn my will and my life over to the care of God as I understood Him.” That meant to totally be humble and surrender my daughter over to the care of God. It took quite a while before I actually could do this. It was not until I practiced my fourth, fifth and sixth steps, that I finally was ready to surrender completely.